Mamasan (to her son and boyfriend): Today we are learning about water in its three natural states.

Grandboy: Ok

Mamasan: All of us lock elbows together.

(They do)

Mamasan: Now we walk around, like this (they clumsily walk around, giggling while doing so). We are water in solid state at freezing temperature. We are ice.

(More clumsy walking)

Mamasan: Now the temperature rises and we loosen up. (They unlock elbows and hold hands)

Mamasan: We’re water in fluid form. Let’s dance!

(They dance around, holding hands and laughing)

Mamasan: Ok, final state. Temperature increases… Aaaaand nowwwww we’re STEAM

(They let go of each other’s hands and bounce around the room. If Mamasan owned dogs, they’d be running around barking. She has a cat who is likely watching from a relatively quiet and safe distance.)

—-

We think it’s the boy who is learning. Actually it’s Mamasan who is developing her Ms Frizzle skills, hehe.

Grandboy (frustrated with weeding and smacks the weeding tool on the ground): Aaagh

Me: Please don’t smack the tool on the ground. You’ll break the tool.

Grandboy: BUT YOU’RE BREAKING MY SPIRIT

Me: Ah I see.

Grandboy (about 20 mins into a 2 hour break from electronic entertainment): Has it been 2 hours yet?

Me: No.

Grandboy (digging up another weed): Yes?

Me: No.

Grandboy: How long has it been?

Me: About 20 minutes.

Grandboy: Two hours?

Me: No.

—–

He’s been studying debate at his grandmother’s house again, I see

Grandboy (playing an old-school dungeon crawler video game): Ah! My character. He’s dead.

Me: Jim.

Grandboy: Huh? (distracted by the game, as his other guys are still in battle) O I got the monster. He’s dead.

Me: Jim.

Grandboy: Why do you keep saying, “Jim” when I say, “He’s dead”?

(I proceed to teach him about Bones McCoy, and now this phrase is in his lexicon. Apologies to mamasan)

Grandboy (playing Knights of Pen and Paper II): Yah, he leveled up fast because he’s a low level character. Low level guys move up fast then they level up more slowly as they get higher.

Me: Just like in real life.

Grandboy: Haha grandpa so you’re leveling up more slowly than me?

Me: Yep. But my upgrades are stronger than yours.