Grandboy: Gwumpa hey I like your ‘vention. Does it shoot lasers? Like a BLUE laser or a RED laser?

Me: Nope, no lasers.

Grandboy: How ’bout bullets?

Me: Nope, it doesn’t shoot bullets.

Grandboy: Well then what DOES it shoot?

Me: Rabbits and squirrels and deer. Maybe bears if they come round. Bullets are too small and too fast to hit when they are moving.

Grandboy: Really, gwumpa, REALLY? You gonna tell me that?

Grandboy is officially taken off games committee. His games involve lava pits for the losers. The winners get to play more, even if they want to quit playing

Me: …but what about apple?

Grandboy: No gwumpa, “apple” isn’t a color

Me: Why not?

Grandboy: Because you EAT apples

Me: But you can eat oranges and that’s a color too. So why can’t you eat apples and have a color “apple” too?

Grandboy: Because that’s for a REASON and I don’t know it yet

Me: Here, have a yellow (i hand him a banana)

Grandboy says hurricanes live in the water and make swirlpools. He has no comment about sharknados

Me: …so what about Sharknados?

Grandboy: GWUMPA you making me think about stuff that’s NOT REAL!

Me: O like Santa Claus?

Grandboy: You ruining it for me Gwumpa. I know he’s not real but I pretend he’s real. Not like sharknados.

Me: Maybe Santa rides on sharknados

Grandboy: [the LOOK]