“Gloda does not protect”, bellowed Explattr, his eyes glowing with suppressed rage, “against exceptions thrown by openUnsharedDatabase on corrupt databases!”
The phrase echoed throughout the chamber, becoming eerily magnified as it shattered against the far reaches. Bits of sparkly dust showered from the upper reaches of the booming cavern, dancing in faint mockery of the gravity of the situation.
TypeError however, held his ground, unwavering.
“this.asyncConnection is null”, he replied quietly, his limbs shivering with fear. It had to be said. No one could deny this was, in fact true, no matter how much no one wanted to believe it.
“But I’m afraid there’s more,” he continued on, ignoring the fact that Explattr was inching closer, his menacing limp thudding into the rocky and slippery ground, shooting shards of stone left and right, “nounDef is undefined.”
With that, the oncoming behemoth stopped, a confused look momentarily crossing his visage as he considered the possibilities. “And what”, he mused almost to himself, “…what has become of of freetag?”
TypeError heaved a small sigh. The worst had passed, but the path was still dangerous. “Freetag decided to go to opt/homes/daniele. Once he arrived, he found the NS_ERROR_FILE_NOT_FOUND in the openUnsharedDatabase, component returned, failure code…” his voice trailed off, mindful of his friend’s recent and painful experience with this.
Explattr shook his giant head slowly, as if to gently shake the memory of the thing from his mind. “0x80520012?” He asked quietly.
TypeError nodded, knowing how much this meant to the ragged and ancient giant. “The very same.”
“Then we must go, and swiftly,” commanded the hulking mountain of a man to his trembling, fragile but brave companion, “for the time has come when gloda.everybody must begin loading resource for app/modules! Off then to Bugzilla! We shall bring invoke the arcane nsIXPCComponents_Utils.import to battle bug 520139 once and for all!”
TypeError smiled. This was indeed the start of a new and better era. He even found the strength to raise his eyes to Explattr, with a mischievous gleam in his eye, “And also for registering indexer: ab_indexer?”
“Ha!” boomed Explattr, again causing dust to silently shower the two in twinkly cover, “Yes, indeed, for Event-Driven Indexing is now true!”
And somewhere, far away, Gloda smiled with them.
[Thanks for the underlying text from https://bugzilla.mozilla.org/show_bug.cgi?id=520139. I like my version better, even if it’s jumbling things all up. I plead upon the name of Art to issue forgiveness of my Science transgressions]